It must be the pictures. Everyone wants to see my hot hot bod. Hmm. Maybe not - I specifically chose unflattering images. Well in any case, I’m loving the increased traffic. Nothing exceptional, of course, but at least the bulk of my hits don’t consist of me checking my site formatting anymore. Baby steps, people, baby steps.

Sounds logical to me
I think I’m going to throw up
http://www.bmezine.com/news/people/A10101/trepan/

Science was never this… fun?
No, I’m not a perverted little boy. I came across… Hmm. Bad choice of words. You’ll understand soon. Well then. I encountered the article about ‘them’ on nerve.com a few weeks ago, which has unfortunately become paid content since then. If you haven’t heard about them, Real Dolls are the latest and greatest sex doll around. They look (arguably) real, feel (arguably) real, and smell (definitely) of silicone. While the main article may now be unattainable, I did find a large amount of excerpts from the original article here:
http://bakshi.us/users/redskunk/index.php?p=64
Crazy.

Office linebacker
I apologize if the previous link was offensive to you. To counter the offensiveness, I give you Terry Tate, linebacker extraordinaire. He’ll kick the offensiveness right outta your ass. Bitch.
http://terrytate.reebok.com/watch.asp

Tattoos are cool. Except for that "permanent" thing…
Worry no more. Now absolute pussies can also be living works of art.
http://64.225.33.220/

Score one for the freeloaders
No more registering! If you run across a site that needs a login/registration, dump it into this place - it’ll spit out one. Absolutely Filibuster!
http://bugmenot.com/

I would hide a very small midget to drive mine
$1 million dollars to the winner. What would robots do with that money anyways!? Why is it always me who has to think of these things? Cursed with geniousnessness I guess.
http://www.nature.com/nsu/040301/040301-15.html

Hell’s not hot enough. Let’s send down some Goodness Gracious Great Balls of Fire.
Don’t ask why. Just accept that you control a fireball, and we’ll all be happy. Fun in its simplicity.
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/fireballs.html

A guy’s gotta practice
More games. Scope out those babes (but don’t get caught!)
http://www.area29.com/flash/index.php?g=donttouch

It’s actually more fun to drown him
MORE games. Froggy. Eat and jump. such is life.
http://ferryhalim.com/orisinal/g3/frog.htm

Dawn of the Dead. Cats.
Good thing you have your dog-zooka…
http://www.matazone.co.uk/night_of_the_zombie_kitties.html

It’s really not playing in rewind
Body Sailing in gale winds. Gotta love the flailing of the arms.
http://www.thomasscott.net/bodysailing/

DO feed the squirrels
Feeding a furry friend through a window. The last picture is amazing.
http://www.funpic.hu/ot2/ot8770.jpg

Don’t make friends. Make Fiends.
This is great! Little French Goth girl terrorizes elementary school. Hijinks ensue.
http://makingfiends.com/

I was going to get into an as-always humorous rant about something or other, but (hey! Don’t you dare click the Back button!) I came across this recently, and felt it’s important enough to take priority.  Yeah I know, more important than stupid links!?  Sheesh.

A very powerful document was accidentally leaked by the pentagon recently concerning the role that climate change will have in the near future.  Specifically, about how this up-until-now scientific debate will have devastating consequences on the state of the geo-political world once the full effects of it start going full swing, and importantly, concerning the security of all of our nations.

There’s really a horrible picture of the future being painted.

It’s all about those ocean currents (pic: davidsuzuki.org).  The world’s climate is regulated in large part due to these massive looping currents.  The Atlantic current loop comes back down south along the coasts of Labrador, and does so at a deeper depth because of its greater salinity which it picks up roughly around the coast of Labrador.  Because of global warming, the melting ice caps from the north cause a massive infusion of fresh water at the point where the current loops back south.  The resulting current does not fall deep anymore, the massive ocean “heat pump” loses power, and the whole climate in the northern hemisphere changes. 

From ran.org:
As the planet’s carrying capacity shrinks, an ancient pattern re-emerges: the eruption of desperate, all-out wars over food, water, and energy supplies. As Harvard archaeologist Steven LeBlanc has noted, wars over resources were the norm until about three centuries ago. When such conflicts broke out, 25% of a population’s adult males usually died. As abrupt climate change hits home, warfare may again come to define human life.

As horrible as this all is, it’s nothing new, and it’s actually a good thing in my opinion.  Good, because this should shove the issue down the throats of those who deny it.  Good, because it embarrasses the hell out of the Bush administration who have been saying all along that climate change doesn’t exist.  Of course it doesn’t.  The proof is in the cheques from the oil barons.

Hopefully, my neighbours to the south will soon plug into their ecological consciencethat the rest of the world seems to be preoccupied with.  And hell, a movie couldn’t hurt either.

Shriek!  What on earth happened here?!  It’s as if.. good lord… as if…

…as if..

ABSOLUTELY NOTHING HAS CHANGED!

(*shifty eyes*) Ok, I’m the first to admit that there isn’t MUCH of a difference from before.  But, it did take a while, and for that reason alone it is worthy of a post.  Oh come on, if you’ve been here before, you know that there’s already been much worse reasons.  Give it a rest.

First of all, I housecleaned my stylesheet, which, if you’re unfamiliar with that term, is the file that dictates the styles, colors, etc.  of this thar here site.  The page should now look just as good on a netscape browser as a IE one, which it didn’t before.  A warning - if you make the window thin, the sidebar may get popped to the bottom of the page!  We’ll work on that later.  After I get the interactive hologram working.  (Cough).

More importantly, however, is the Über-cool new banner I gots floating up there on top.  Go ahead, take a peek.  I’ll wait.

Took your sweet-ass time didn’t you?  I’m a busy man here, for jehosophat’s sake.  Can’t blame you though - it is sweet.  And the best, the best part is that there’s a random picture that appears every time the page is loaded.  Go ahead, give it a whirl.  But if you break my server, I’ll kill you.  Slowly.  Like I’ll dissolve you in my mouth or something.  I can start on your ear.

If you’re interested in the javascript that generates the random pic, you can take a look at my source (it’s at the top, search for <div id=”header”> or you can go where I found it.

Slowly but surely, this little bloggy o’ mine is getting purtyer.  Enjoy.

Thankfully for all of you, nothing interesting happened to me recently that I would otherwise have felt the need to tell you all about.  Breathe a collective sigh of relief.  Except you - eating the garlic bread.  You can use your nose.

Although it’s not up to my usual standards for length, I thought I’d get a few of these beauties out there.  Many more on the way soon.

PWRINCESS…
From the delightfully twisted and sick minds of Trey Parker and Matt Stone, the creators of South Park, comes the abandoned series Princess, it being too.. well.. watch.  You can use the username: 1a2b3c and the password: delirium to get in :)
http://www.trioplus.tv/plus/princess/ep01.html
 
There’s a lot of shit fertilizer being shovelled here…
Remember that EyeGrow game?  Well, this is by the same guy, newly released.  Click-*tilt*.
http://www.eyezmaze.com/vanilla/
 
OOO! An Adventure game!  Excuse me while I fetch my shotgun.
I loathe adventure games.  But, some special people like them.  Are you special too?  In any case, it’s well done, so I can respect it for that.  There’s also a chat box on the bottom to ask for help when you get stuck, also cool.  I just don’t understand what ’s so damn entertaining about finding the exact 5-pixel wide spot on the screen where your mouse will do something interesting, over and over again.  Ooo look if I move my mouse here and drag my item here then I can pick up this doodad and turn on the faucet which will wet the cat who will screech in anger and trigger the microphone which opens the blinds so I can wake up.  Absolutely enthralling.  But don’t let me stop you.
http://server-admin.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/motas/mystery/testgame.htm

The right angles make it aerodynamic
My family used to own a Dodge Aries.  I’m glad it rusted itself into submission, or it might still be with us.  The horror.
http://www.nevara.com/sideshow/thoughtvendor.html
 
Orgasms from around the world
Everyone can use a little culture in their lives every now and then.  Open your mind, people.
http://www.ratedtoons.com/flash/Interorgasm.swf

Many things aren’t interesting.

For example, take me.

Yes, really - I’m trying to entice you.  (cough) Ok - actually, I was trying to make a point.  Taken by themselves, these sadly-uninteresting “things” (as I like to call them) are easily forgettable.  However, when brought together with other like “things”, it all turns into a blog post.  Simply horrid, isn’t it?

I came across this article a little while ago.  Nothing revolutionary, I assure you.  But what it does do well is one of those “this-is-the-state-we-are-in-and-this-is-what-the-future-will-be-like” things.  Like those glimpses of the future that were around a lot back when the entire world consisted solely of monochrome hues of grey.  You know, it was the 70’s or something.  The article itself offers a plethora of links to many different “huh.  That’s kinda neat…” robot-related endeavours.  Be sure to check out the iRobot Roomba.

Of course, the future will also offer artificial spouses for little people.  There’s no sense in being discriminatory - how shameful.  Heh, no no no.  Pick that slack jaw of yours right up off the floor, by golly!  It’s really all about having a weird little friend in your house that basically (from what I gather from this site) will annoy the hell out of you.  This looks like the next big step after Aibo, which is on it’s third generation.  The new robo-puppy can be programmed, act as an adult or a puppy, take pictures of what it sees (and provide access for you to see them), and recognize the owner’s face.  He even pees oil on the floor.

Finally, I’m sure you’ve heard of Honda’s ASIMO.  This guy recently showed up in happenin’ Montreal down at the old port’s science museum.  For at least the last 16 years, they’ve been working on the most simple (at least to us) of movements - walking.  He’s finally getting pretty good at it!  You can tell that sony’s pint-size QRIO must have been spawned in some fashion from this granddaddy.

And here’s some more props to my local scene (Bombardier is based in Quebec) taken from the article I first mentioned:
“Among the regional residents is Bombardier Transportation, which makes the people movers in airports. “They are looking to expand to downtown transportation,” Thomasmeyer said, an effort that will involve technologies to avoid inevitable obstacles.”

Moving sidewalks be damned.  What I’m waiting for is teleporters.  Of course, you’ll die every time you use one.  You see, instead of moving your atoms to another location, a teleporter will just remake you at the far end.  So it’s a copy.  And in this wonderful age of file sharing that we live in, we all know that when you copy something, the original doesn’t disappear.  To prevent the exponential cloning of yourself that would occur every time you were too lazy to take the stairs, you gotta be destroyed, atom by atom, as you are remade in the second location.  Pleasant.

Personally, I’ll use my trusty jetpack.

Yep, the future is coming.  As.. it always.. does?…  (ahem.) Machines that pass the Turing test are just around the corner.  In fact, forget the future; some of them already even have livejournals!