That play on words might be a bit much.  Even I’m not getting it.  And especially since I’m explicitly referring to it.  Bah.

I don’t remember where I found these pictures, but I thought it was funny then, and now, well, I think that J-Lo and Ben Afflek breaking up is just terrible.  I cried all night.

It was some photoshopping challenge.  This is the original photo:

Now, my favorite entires:

return false;
}
">WhatistheSteve-trix
return false;
}
">Cue the JAWS music
return false;
}
">How about a change in career?
return false;
}
">Whoopsie

I came into school/work today, and it seems the water is deemed contaminated or something like it, and consumption of water is not recommended until further notice.  Well that’s just lovely.  Apparently some people were getting sick.  They must have had weak immune systems, those pussies.  After drinking that nasty street-clementine juice, however, I don’t have such a problem.  I could drink some juice of Yak (don’t ask.  Just pretend it exists) and go lick a pole on the bus and still come out of it laughing.  It certainly pays to do nasty things to yourself it seems.  Don’t take that advice too far, though.

I also would like to point out that there has now been 1000 visitors here.  Sure, about 75% of them were me (no exaggeration), but I guess that simply means that I think that my site is pretty cool.

Earlier in the week I was getting all stressed out over graduate school applications - namely, that it’s almost fucking impossible to find a simple list of what you need to do to apply to any particular school.  So you’re left guessing whether or not you need certain documents.  Oh, it’s also great that when you fill out an “online application”, you still need to mail in some stuff manually afterwards.  How amazingly great would it be if you could just complete everything in one interface?  Well, maybe in a few years.  For now, the stress builds character.  Or something.

I was just looking at entry comments, and I discovered that someone (most likely a bot) has spammed the comments to one of my older posts.  I mean I can see the relation - my blog, in which I talk about my life and post some fun links, and an online casino, in which you.. um.. well, don’t talk to anyone and get trapped by popups.

What does this mean in the grand (tiny) scheme of things?

I’ve arrived, people.

I miss Sharon, Lois and Bran.  They sure knew how to party!

The itsy-bitsy-spiiiiderrrr, climbed up the water spout!…

Enough. Why can’t I leave my childhood behind?

It’s not porn!… not really…
It’s sort of a strange place, this.  From what I can tell this guy has basically shared access to a directory of his on the internet.  So there’s a whole bunch of videos and media that you can play with if you have some time - most of them are pretty funny or good, but I haven’t gone through all of them.  One of extreme note, however, is this one:
return false;
}
">Gay Radio Station Ad (From Down Under - Think it ever aired?..) (4 MB)

Others:
return false;
}
">Crazy Save (His teammates must have kicked his ass afterwards) (700 KB)
return false;
}
">Nice Anim, catchy tune! (Hell has no fury like a (Alien) woman scorned) (3 MB)
return false;
}
">Diving Competition in Iraq (Ouch) (2.8 MB)

If you’re interested, the directory is here:
http://gallery.sparklet.com/video/ 

From Tubby to Tanned
Depending on your point of view, this guy is either an inspiration to us all or a testament to the shallowness of our society.  Whatever the verdict, it’s strangely hypnotic to observe his transformation.  Scroll down towards the bottom of the main page to see the progression of pictures by Month, Week or Daily!
http://www.johnstonefitness.com  

Safe from the Aliens at last
I’d like to think that the reason this apartment is like this is because the guy who lives there is bonkers, or has seen Close Encounters one too many times.  Sadly, no, it’s just his friend who’s crazy.  Top Tip: If you’re going away for a few days, don’t leave your apartment in the hands of your best friend.  

Articles:
http://salon.com/news/wire/2004/01/08/foil/index.html
http://blacktable.com/elder040114.htm  

PICTURES:
http://www.meetluke.com/NxAlbumImageThumbnailView.asp?number=91

This is a Baby.  YOUR BABY.
Come on.. Dads aren’t this clueless are they? Father is going to baby-sit his child for the first time.  Mother leaves instructions in the only way men really understand: in a powerpoint presentation.
http://www.gnjallen.com/daddy.htm  

"Dan is like a normal first-aid kit, but it’s guaranteed to save you a hundred pounds a month."
To quote one of the characters on the genius Ren & Stimpy show: WHAT ARE YA?  (The horse…) Type your name (or anything else!) in to find out!
http://thesurrealist.co.uk/priorart.cgi  

*SPASM*..*JERK*…*WRIGGLE*…
Hey, want a seizure?  Sure you do!  It’s a well-kept secret that they can produce some of the best orgasms.
http://www.2flashgames.com/f/f-374.htm  

Help a poor Goth out
Mosh pit!  Click to the strobe lights.
http://www.traum4tized.com/mosh/  

The Scientific Process… for Creationists
Hypothesis: Creationist children can hold a Science Fair.
Results: No, oh lord no, they can’t.  Oh it’s a fair all right.  But that’s it.  

Excerpt:  
"Middle School Level
1st Place: "Life Doesn’t Come From Non-Life"

Patricia Lewis (grade 8) did an experiment to see if life can evolve from non-life. Patricia placed all the non-living ingredients of life - carbon (a charcoal briquet), purified water, and assorted minerals (a multi-vitamin) - into a sealed glass jar. The jar was left undisturbed, being exposed only to sunlight, for three weeks. (Patricia also prayed to God not to do anything miraculous during the course of the experiment, so as not to disqualify the findings.) No life evolved. This shows that life cannot come from non-life through natural processes."

I guess that settles it then.
http://objective.jesussave.us/creationsciencefair.html

And now a few words about penguins and poo
Why?  Well… just because.

Poo Power!  I thought this was fascinating.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/cbbcnews/hi/animals/newsid_3378000/3378853.stm 

A very simple and fun little game.  Smack that pinguin, dawg. Unfortunately I don’t know who created it, but kudos whoever you are, penguin dude.
return false;
}
">Penguin game

This gives a whole new meaning to Bringing the beach home with you
Mind-boggling.  Very cool.  Has a zen-like beauty to it.  Watch closely - works get destroyed as quickly as they’re made.
return false;
}
">Sicaf (18 MB) 

I know this is what you’ve been waiting for…

Or, it’s just some strangers whose pictures you now have access to.  Let the stalking begin.

The following are a from the party last Friday.  Yes, it is a week later, but hey I’m a busy guy. 

Or, American Idol started a new session.  Evenings only last so long.  Not that I’m hooked or anything.. just love to see my kin (i.e. people that can’t sing) confidently stride in and belt out something so horrid that your skin crawls just listening to it.  And the best part is they get upset when the judges hand them their testicles (figuratively speaking, of course - can’t forget those baritone female singers) on a plate.  Chopped up.  With a parsley garnish.

“What-eva!  They’ll be sorry when I, like, put my CD out!”  Beautiful.

Sorry about some blurriness, someone (*COUGHLINDSAYCOUGH*) forgot to put the flash on at the beginning of the party.  All pictures are… er… untouched and original, and not in any way photoshopped.  Oops.  I can’t say that word anymore.



Alex


Barman


CowVsCow screenshot 


perverts


Josh…what are you wearing!?


kickin’ party


Random peeps


Raymond


Couch potatoes


Sim doing his “thing”


OK, who peed in the sink?


End of Party WhiteBoard

What, you thought that was it?  No no no.  This is a PicFest(tm) after all.

Earlier this week, a student film was being shot in and around our apartment.  That’s another story.  One of the scenes involved the tossing of massive amounts of clementines over our balcony onto the passing actor on the street below.  Or so I hear - I only saw the pictures.  These pictures.


Annnnnnd…Action!


Always recycle, kids!


More, more clementines

I got home, and lo there were crates upon crates of clementines.  One of which contained the recovered fruit that had been honourably sacrificed over the balcony.  It was a sight to behold - every single one had a split in it’s side.

Naturally, we made some juice.  The street certainly added its own distinctive flavour.


Um… A-OK? Hope so…


I’m not smiling, I’m trying not to hurl


Clementines can make you dumb

What my brave roommate is doing in the last picture is chewin’ on the massive amounts of pulp we generated.  You see, we don’t own any form of a juicer.  Not even that stupid plastic thing that looks like a upside-down jello mold with a handle.  But we do have a handheld blender.

Uncle Dan’s 3 step clementine juice
1. Throw clementines off balcony and retrieve.
2. Peel busted clementines and place in large open bowl
3. Blend! (Everything - seeds included)
(4.) Clean juice off body, cover top of open bowl with saran wrap.  Repeat step 3.

Optional: When the blender clogs up with pulp, dump into a bowl.  Visual aid in last picture on what to do with it afterwards.

Finally, a bunch o’ my famous (ahem) links will be arriving here shortly.  I’m always on the lookout :).  Blog you soon.